Mindful Eating

Have you noticed that mindfulness seems to be the panacea of our time? Well, it works for weight management, too. Eating when you're hungry, eating what your body wants, enjoying every bite, and stopping when you've had enough all require paying attention. Paying attention = being mindful. Mindful eating is eating with intention, with awareness and without judgment.

If you've never actually tried a mindful eating exercise, I highly recommend giving it a try. It'll only take five minutes.

Here's what you do:

1. Choose a bite sized bit of food. (You can do it with a whole meal, but it will take a lot longer!) In my class we had a choice of a chocolate chip or a grape. I've heard raisins recommended, but raisins are not a food I personally want to pay too much attention to.

2. Before you start eating, take a few deep breaths. Bring your attention to your food and the act of eating. (I think it's important that we always stop to acknowledge that we are about to eat. That in itself can be a big step!)

3. Think about what had to happen in the world to bring you this bite of food. (I found this part very profound!) Is it in its original form or has it been transformed into whatever it is now (eg, if you're eating a raisin, it was once a grape which was once part of a bunch which was once attached to a grape vine, etc.)? How many people might have been involved in making this piece of food what it is and getting to you? Were there factories involved, packaging, transportation, grocery stores?

4. Look at your food and notice what it looks like. Bring it up to your nose and notice what it smells like. Touch it to your lips and notice what it feels like.

5. NOW you can eat it! Notice how we're on step 5 before it even gets in your mouth? See how slowly you can eat it, how long you can make it last. Notice what it feels like in your mouth. Notice what it tastes like. Notice how different parts of your mouth respond to it. Be curious about it. If you find your mind wandering, gently remind yourself that you are eating and bring your attention back to your food and your body.

6. When you swallow, let your attention follow the food all the way down to your belly.

7. If you have any bites left (not likely if you chose the chocolate chip!), take a breath or two before taking the next one.

When I did this exercise in class with a chocolate chip, we were asked to spend five minutes eating that one thing. (One person in the class had finished his before we even started!) Now obviously our busy lives will not allow that kind of time spent on every bite we eat, but once you've done this exercise, you might be able to bring a little more mindfulness to each meal.

If we can also be mindful of our bodies while we eat, we can really experience eating for the sake of providing ourselves nutrition rather than for any other reason (what other reason could there be?).

I just got three new books about mindful eating so I might have more to say on this later! In the meantime, if you want more information, I got a hand out in my class called The Principles of Mindful Eating which came from The Center for Mindful Eating at www.tcme.org.

One final thought: Although I am an atheist and have never been one to say grace before a meal, there is something very relevant and compelling about the practice of acknowledging and appreciating every meal before you eat it. We are incredibly fortunate to even have the option of overeating, aren't we?

Small Spoons, Small Plates

This is sort of another aside, but very important. Judith Beck points out the cultural issues around overeating. Our society is all about huge portions these days. (If you haven't seen the movie Super Size Me, run out and rent it right now!) American restaurants serve much larger portions than is the norm in other countries or was the norm here a generation or so ago. We are used to seeing big plates filled up with big portions for every meal, so a normal portion looks small to us and makes us feel deprived.

Think of this: your stomach is only about the size of your fist. Of course it stretches, like a balloon, but think about how much food it would actually take to fill it up without blowing it up: not much, huh?

My friend Terri commented about eating her ice cream (actually it was low fat frozen yogurt, wasn't it?) with a small spoon and how that changed her experience (THANKS for commenting, Terri!!!): that's something I hadn't though of that would be fun to experiment with. I also recommend serving yourself on a small plate. Check out The Small Plate Movement at www.smallplatemovement.org. It's an easy thing to try.

How Not To Eat Behind Your Own Back

I had a few asides there, but I am back on track. We left off with Judith Beck telling us to to eat slowly, sitting down, and enjoying every bite (or something along those lines, right?). This is about paying attention. When we are eating for reasons other than hunger, we go out of our way not to pay attention. That is when we try to eat behind our own backs.

Geneen Roth's eating guidelines mirror Beck's suggestion, although Roth puts much more focus on these ideas, while Beck slumps them together as one of many "skills" to master.

You may remember Roth's first three guidelines: Eat When You Are Hungry; Eat What Your Body Wants; Stop Eating When You've Had Enough.

Guideline #4 is Eat Sitting Down. Apparently this means at a table. She goes out of her way to tell us this does not include eating in the car. I get the impression that lots of people, especially emotional eaters, eat standing up in front of the fridge. I rarely do this, nor do I eat in the car, but I did catch myself eating my daughter's leftovers as I stood at the sink to do the dishes. Mom: the garbage disposal. I also eat standing up at parties. OK, maybe there's no place to sit down at the party, but you get the idea. It's like if you are standing up it doesn't count. If you fix yourself a plate, maybe even set a placemat and a napkin, light a candle or something...you are much more likely to realize that you are eating. Sounds simple. Try it!

Guideline #5 is Eat Without Distractions. Again, it's all about paying attention. TURN OFF YOUR TV. (That's my guideline #1!) Of course, you may be chatting with your family or friends, you may have some music playing, but let eating be what you are primarily doing. If you are eating while you're driving, you are, hopefully, mostly driving (for example). If you are eating while you are watching TV, you may keep eating until the show is over and not even know what you had. Even if you cannot escape distraction altogether, make a point of checking in with your body every now and then. How do you feel? Has your body had enough?

Guideline #6 is Eat with the Intention of Being in Full View of Others. Do you have eating habits that you would never indulge in when you had company? Do you sneak food that you would never eat if someone were watching? I remember a few times that I ate something simply BECAUSE no one was watching me. (Can't miss those opportunities!) Of course, we all have times we eat alone (and if we are trying to eat without distraction, it is helpful to eat alone sometimes), but we should then respect ourselves as our own witnesses. (What would I think if I saw myself eating this way?)

Guideline #7 is Eat with Enjoyment, Gusto and Pleasure. When you eat a bag of chips while you're watching TV when you are not hungry, do you enjoy them? (Do you even notice them?) Diets can take all the joy out of eating, but eating can be and should be pleasurable. (For me it's too pleasurable.) If you really feel hungry, and you choose something that your body wants and needs, and you sit down and pay attention to the food you've chosen, and then you stop eating when your body has had enough so that you don't ruin the beauty of this meal with a follow up tummy-ache and possible guilt-fest, don't you think you would really enjoy that food? And if you really enjoy and appreciate your food, don't you think you will pay attention to it?

Do you eat behind your own back? If so, do you enjoy that food? And you don't enjoy the food, what is that about?

If you think you don't eat behind your own back (like I did), try following all these guidelines. If one of them is hard for you, that's where you need to put your attention. (If they're all easy, you probably don't need to be reading my blog!)

Remember, it's simple: all you have to do is pay attention.

goals so far

I told you I'd mention possible goals as we went along, and I have not. Based on what we've talked about so far, you might want to consider goals such as:

I will do a self assessment every three months.

I will write at least one long term goal and one goal for this week which will be my first step.

I will track my hunger level before and after every meal for one week.

I will not eat unless I am a 4 or below on the hunger scale at least 3 times this week.

I will stop eating at a 5 or 6 at least one meal a day.

I will make a list of reasons I want to manage my weight.

Even one will do. Choose a goal, write it down, work with it. What can you do in the next 24 hours to improve how you manage your weight? What can you do this week to move you in the direction of your long term goal?

Checking In

Hullo? Anybody out there? Several people have told me they've been reading, but no one is writing! No comments? No questions? No complaints, tirades or confessions? Please, tell me I'm crazy or tell me this is what you've been waiting for. Tell me what's working for you and what isn't. Tell me your successes and challenges. I know I'm not the only one with something to say about all this!

A Few More Tips

I forgot two more quick tips from Judith Beck.

When you want to eat and you're not hungry, drink water.

Or, imagine past the instant gratification to 15 minutes from now. How will you feel if you eat; how will you feel if you don't?

A Few Tips

There are a few more things I learned from Judith Beck that I want to share with you before I move on.

She does talk about differentiating between hunger and non-hunger, but we've covered that. She also talks about decatastrophizing hunger. This was interesting to me. I tend to avoid eating until I'm starving, and then I scarf, but a friend of mine does just the opposite: she does everything she can to avoid getting hungry in the first place, so she snacks all day. Both of us end up over-eating, but her style was new to me! Either way, Ms. Beck's point here is well taken: hunger is not an emergency. I don't need to get in a panic and overeat, and she doesn't need to avoid hunger by eating all day.

She also talks about things you can do to manage cravings. She talks about this in a very "restrictive eating" context, i.e., to avoid going off your diet. I think they can be used in an intuitive eating context too. If you are trying to eat only when you're hungry and to stop eating when your body has had enough, there are going to be times when you want to eat that don't fit those guidelines. Now maybe by now you've gone to therapy to figure out the underlying emotional issues and this is no longer a problem, but short of that, here are some simple techniques (in addition to those mentioned in the last post).

Ms. Beck describes an "Oh Well" technique in which you may feel disappointed that you are not eating that brownie sundae, but you just tell yourself, "oh well," which puts it in the category of being in a situation that you just have to accept, like being stuck in traffic.

I hate these little "techniques" because they feel so contrived and simplistic, but I was stuck in traffic on my way to work last week and was just making the worst of it, feeling annoyed with myself for the route I'd taken, wondering how much longer this would take than if I'd just stayed on 280, generally torturing myself over nothing. Then I just stopped and said, "Oh well." Suddenly, just like that, I was no longer tortured or even annoyed. I was perfectly content. It worked like a charm. (I haven't tried it with food yet, though.)

She also suggests a "No Choice" technique which is similar. Think of the conversations you have in your head about food sometimes. (Like, "Gosh, that brownie looks good." "Don't even think about it, fatso! That's the last thing you need." "But how can I possibly resist? It's freshly baked!" "Don't you dare!" ETC.) Would you ever go through that kind of torment over brushing your teeth? Putting on your seatbelt? Those are things we've put in the No Choice category. She suggests putting "sticking to your diet" in that category, but we're not dieting, are we? I used it, long before I listened to this CD, with exercise. I was having ridiculous arguments every morning about whether or not I would get up early to exercise, and the NO vote was always winning. Finally I got so sick of myself, I just started doing it, and that required basically putting it in the No Choice category. (Incidentally, I also told my husband my plan and had too much pride not to do what I'd said I'd do. That helped more than anything I think.)

She also suggests that if you get off track, rather than using that as an excuse to get farther off track ("I've already eaten two donuts: what's one more?"), cut your losses as soon as you. And, when in doubt, distract yourself from the temptation. (She recommends creating a "distraction box," which might include, among other things, clear nail polish because if you paint your nails your craving will likely be gone by the time your nails are dry. Again, that's not for me, but there it is.

OK, here's the clincher: "Learn to eat everything sitting down, slowly, and enjoying every bite." Here, we hit the jackpot! She mentions this as one of many skills to learn, but I think this, along with differentiating hunger from non-hunger, is the key to what we all need, and this will lead me to my next post...