Ways to Motivate Yourself

I've found a few things that have significantly increased my motivation to exercise regularly which I would like to share with you.

1. Buy a pedometer. This was the first thing that got me to really pay attention to my daily activity level. I have to thank Kaiser for this one. They sponsored a "Walk Across Italy" race at work. Last year they walked across Cancun and I thought the whole thing was pretty silly, but for some reason, this year I got into it. I was even a team captain! In teams of six, we all tracked how many steps we walked each day for six weeks with the goal of all our steps adding up to some huge number of miles which is the distance from the north to the south of Italy. Or something like that. Anyway, being accountable to my team members motivated me a lot, and I really enjoyed tracking my daily steps. I continued doing it for months on my own after the race was over. It really makes you very conscious of the level of activity you have built into your regular routine and makes you look for simple ways to increase it. It's fun to see what your average daily steps are and then see if you can increase that average by 10% each week. Or something like that.

2. Set goals. People scoff at the goal setting routine I proposed earlier, but it really worked well for me. What's your long term goal for your regular activity level? What would be a small, simple goal that could be achieved in the next week? What could you do in the next 24 hours to increase your regular activity? If I had set a specific goal for the week I was much more likely to actually get up and do some sit-ups or take a quick walk after lunch. It changed the conversations I had with myself when I was lying in bed in the morning. You can get up and meet your goal, or you can lie in bed and fail to meet your goal. Hmm. It was a matter of pride. It was a way to make myself accountable to myself. There's something about that proverbial gold star on the chart that still holds power. Like the pedometer, it's really fun and easy! Using a pedometer is a really easy way to set and track goals, too.

3. Sign up for a race/Exercise with friends. A week from today, I'm running my first 10K--my first race ever, really, and a trail race to boot! If you'd told me a year ago I'd run a 10K this year (or write a blog about weight management), I'd've called you crazy, but here I go. Ten women signed up together and we're renting a house for the weekend. It's something I'm really looking forward to. Four of us have been meeting once a week to train. I can't believe how much farther I can run with friends than by myself! And running on a trail is much more fun than on a treadmill. I've never been so motivated to exercise regularly in my entire life. It's actually fun! Plus it's a great excuse to spend an hour with my friends each week, which is as good for my health as the running is! I look for opportunities to run during the week and I'm disappointed when I don't find them. I actually miss running if I go for more than a few days without it. Don't get me wrong, I'm a naturally sedate person, and the actual running still feels like torture, but now I want to do it anyway! Agreeing to run a 10K with friends has changed my life! (Incidentally, it is this to which I attribute most of the gains on my self-assessment.)

4. Toys make it fun. We got a Wii Fit Plus for Christmas, and it is so much fun! It's not all cardio-driven, but any of it is better than sitting on the couch and watching TV. It's fun for the whole family! I also splurged and spend an extra $30 on a Nike-ipod set-up when I bought new trail running shoes for the race. There's a sensor in the shoe and a gadget you plug into your ipod when you run that tracks your time and distance. I haven't tried this yet, but I guess you can upload it to nike.com and track your training and do all kinds of fun things with it. I usually steer clear of things like this, but both of these have helped motivate me to MOVE MORE.

Do the Math

Even though I just suggested you don't embrace the idea that you "should" exercise to lose weight, I think it's important to know how it works. This is basic information that may be common knowledge, but I had to look it up.

A pound = 3500 calories, so if, for example, you wanted to lose a pound in a week, you'd have to burn 3500 calories or reduce your intake by 3500 calories, or some combination of the two. That's 500 calories a day. That's about 5 miles (about one hour) of running. (Running burns about 100 calories in 10 minutes; biking 80, brisk walking 50, regular walking 30.) Most of us are not going to start running 5 miles every day, but that's okay, because a pound a week is too ambitious. Try this idea instead: if you add 2000 steps (about one mile) to your daily routine, you'll burn 100 extra calories a day which is over 35,000 calories in a year which adds up to ten pounds.

I've also heard that weight training, while not burning as many calories as cardio, increases your average daily metabolic rate. Muscles burn more calories than fat, three times more according to one source I found on line. I also found a source that denied the whole idea, so who knows, but I like the idea that as I'm turning fat into muscle, I'm speeding up my metabolism.

Move Your Body

When I finally got some decent medical insurance, I went in for a check-up to confirm that I was perfectly healthy. The only advice my doctor gave me was, "Exercise, exercise, exercise!" At the time I was in my 20's and living in the City. I'd just sold my car because the only time I ever drove it was to look for a new parking space on street cleaning day. I walked everywhere. Even at work we would walk to visit our clients. The first time I went out with Matt we saw a play South of Market and ended up walking all the way home to Noe Valley, half way across the city. I was single and plenty of time to go to the gym after work. Exercise was built in to my life. I didn't even have to try.

Things are a little different now. I drive an hour to work. I drive to my patients' homes. I go back to the office and sit in front of a computer. I drive an hour home. By the time I finish with dinner, dishes, helping Quentin with homework, etc., I'm beat. When am I supposed to exercise? Sound familiar? I hear so many people say, "I know I need to exercise, but I just can't find the time." I've said it myself a million times. It's not as easy as it used to be to incorporate into the old routine.

Even writing about exercise is hard to fit in! I wrote this whole entry and a couple more in my head about two weeks ago and am just now finding a chance to sit down at the computer. Now I can't remember what I wanted to say!

Well I think it's just a choice we have to make. I can't tell you how many mornings I lay in bed arguing with myself about whether or not to get up and exercise. What a waste of my mind-time! You just have to decide it's something that is important to you.

I think the idea that we "should" exercise to help us lose weight carries a lot of the same dynamics as going on a diet. I think it's much more effective to choose to be more active for the joy of moving your body and for mental and physical health. And it just has to be a priority, a given, like brushing your teeth. Instead of trying to figure out how to fit exercise into your busy schedule, figure out how to fit your busy schedule around your exercise. (I have to give Judith Beck credit for that one.) Is everything else that fills up your day really that essential? Is it as important as maintaining your mental and physical health?

My fried Laurie says, "anything is better than nothing." Start where you are. See if you can add just a little bit more movement to your days. If you're not getting any exercise at all, start by stretching for five minutes once a week: certainly you can find five minutes. And if you can find five minutes on one day, you can probably find five minutes twice a week. And so on. Find something fun to do--it doesn't have to be drudgery. Dance in the kitchen while you're cooking. Put on some rocking music while you're cleaning the house. And the old stand-bys: take the stairs and park farther away. The more you move, the better you'll feel. Really: it's true!

Transitioning

I don't know about you, but I went on a Christmas tear! I ate all the chocolate I could get my hands on, and I did some excessive after-Christmas-sale on-line shopping: general over-consuming. Thank goodness for the New Year to put an end to all this holiday mania! With resolutions in place, I was ready to jump right back in to my new, healthy, balanced relationship with food and put an end to the grasping chocolate addiction and overall wantingness.

Along with eating mindfully and intuitively, I had decided to stop eating sugar altogether and cut down on the carbs. Hmm, that sounds suspiciously like a dieter's mentality, doesn't it? Stopping the binge in favor or restrictive eating? Can you guess how well that worked for me?

That first day back to work there was the goodbye potluck for one of my all time favorite co-workers--a sad occasion, worthy of a good meal--to which someone brought the most amazing donuts I have ever seen in my life. Then there was not one but two big boxes of those fabulous little hazelnut chocolate balls wrapped in gold foil. It would be no problem if I could eat just one or even two or three, but no! I took it upon myself to work through those boxes as quickly as possible so that we could all be done with them and move on! I was shocked when someone pointed out that they actually have whole hazelnuts in the middle: I had never noticed! I don't like hazelnuts! Boy was I relieved when they were all gone.

It was not the start to the new year I had pictured for myself.

Now, as I'm reminding myself of all the things I have learned in the last year, I am calming down and relaxing into a more normal eating pattern, and I'm noticing that since I started working with all of these ideas four months ago, I do eat very differently. I couldn't eat as much as I did 6 months ago if I tried! I get full quickly and actually feel satisfied. I appreciate my food more, and, excepting the chocolate binge, I want less of it. This is no crash diet, that's for sure! It is testing my patience as a weight loss tactic. But it is so much more than that.

OK, it was time to retake that self assessment. Remember that? It was four months after I had taken it the first time when I started the weight management class. On a scale of 1-10, my satisfaction with all the areas it addressed had averaged a 5 back in September. Now it's a 7. Wow! I am 20% more satisfied with basic and important aspects of my life and my health than I was 4 months ago! That's a 5% a month increase--a pretty good return.

So, I had my Christmas tear, but overall, I am on a good path and want to continue in that direction. It is, overall, very satisfying.

As we transition into a new year, I am also going to transition the focus of this blog from eating to exercising--part 2 of 3. (Part 3 is about self care, stress management, spirituality, that kind of thing, but we'll get to that later.) I have much less to say about exercising than I have about eating because, well, it's just not as complicated, but it is just as important.

One last little aside I have to include about mindful eating before I move on, though: I told my 7 year old daughter about the mindful eating exercise I described in my last post, and she proceeded to show me how it's done. She spent the next FORTY-FIVE minutes eating three small squares of a chocolate bar. She's my hero!

Mindful Eating

Have you noticed that mindfulness seems to be the panacea of our time? Well, it works for weight management, too. Eating when you're hungry, eating what your body wants, enjoying every bite, and stopping when you've had enough all require paying attention. Paying attention = being mindful. Mindful eating is eating with intention, with awareness and without judgment.

If you've never actually tried a mindful eating exercise, I highly recommend giving it a try. It'll only take five minutes.

Here's what you do:

1. Choose a bite sized bit of food. (You can do it with a whole meal, but it will take a lot longer!) In my class we had a choice of a chocolate chip or a grape. I've heard raisins recommended, but raisins are not a food I personally want to pay too much attention to.

2. Before you start eating, take a few deep breaths. Bring your attention to your food and the act of eating. (I think it's important that we always stop to acknowledge that we are about to eat. That in itself can be a big step!)

3. Think about what had to happen in the world to bring you this bite of food. (I found this part very profound!) Is it in its original form or has it been transformed into whatever it is now (eg, if you're eating a raisin, it was once a grape which was once part of a bunch which was once attached to a grape vine, etc.)? How many people might have been involved in making this piece of food what it is and getting to you? Were there factories involved, packaging, transportation, grocery stores?

4. Look at your food and notice what it looks like. Bring it up to your nose and notice what it smells like. Touch it to your lips and notice what it feels like.

5. NOW you can eat it! Notice how we're on step 5 before it even gets in your mouth? See how slowly you can eat it, how long you can make it last. Notice what it feels like in your mouth. Notice what it tastes like. Notice how different parts of your mouth respond to it. Be curious about it. If you find your mind wandering, gently remind yourself that you are eating and bring your attention back to your food and your body.

6. When you swallow, let your attention follow the food all the way down to your belly.

7. If you have any bites left (not likely if you chose the chocolate chip!), take a breath or two before taking the next one.

When I did this exercise in class with a chocolate chip, we were asked to spend five minutes eating that one thing. (One person in the class had finished his before we even started!) Now obviously our busy lives will not allow that kind of time spent on every bite we eat, but once you've done this exercise, you might be able to bring a little more mindfulness to each meal.

If we can also be mindful of our bodies while we eat, we can really experience eating for the sake of providing ourselves nutrition rather than for any other reason (what other reason could there be?).

I just got three new books about mindful eating so I might have more to say on this later! In the meantime, if you want more information, I got a hand out in my class called The Principles of Mindful Eating which came from The Center for Mindful Eating at www.tcme.org.

One final thought: Although I am an atheist and have never been one to say grace before a meal, there is something very relevant and compelling about the practice of acknowledging and appreciating every meal before you eat it. We are incredibly fortunate to even have the option of overeating, aren't we?

Small Spoons, Small Plates

This is sort of another aside, but very important. Judith Beck points out the cultural issues around overeating. Our society is all about huge portions these days. (If you haven't seen the movie Super Size Me, run out and rent it right now!) American restaurants serve much larger portions than is the norm in other countries or was the norm here a generation or so ago. We are used to seeing big plates filled up with big portions for every meal, so a normal portion looks small to us and makes us feel deprived.

Think of this: your stomach is only about the size of your fist. Of course it stretches, like a balloon, but think about how much food it would actually take to fill it up without blowing it up: not much, huh?

My friend Terri commented about eating her ice cream (actually it was low fat frozen yogurt, wasn't it?) with a small spoon and how that changed her experience (THANKS for commenting, Terri!!!): that's something I hadn't though of that would be fun to experiment with. I also recommend serving yourself on a small plate. Check out The Small Plate Movement at www.smallplatemovement.org. It's an easy thing to try.

How Not To Eat Behind Your Own Back

I had a few asides there, but I am back on track. We left off with Judith Beck telling us to to eat slowly, sitting down, and enjoying every bite (or something along those lines, right?). This is about paying attention. When we are eating for reasons other than hunger, we go out of our way not to pay attention. That is when we try to eat behind our own backs.

Geneen Roth's eating guidelines mirror Beck's suggestion, although Roth puts much more focus on these ideas, while Beck slumps them together as one of many "skills" to master.

You may remember Roth's first three guidelines: Eat When You Are Hungry; Eat What Your Body Wants; Stop Eating When You've Had Enough.

Guideline #4 is Eat Sitting Down. Apparently this means at a table. She goes out of her way to tell us this does not include eating in the car. I get the impression that lots of people, especially emotional eaters, eat standing up in front of the fridge. I rarely do this, nor do I eat in the car, but I did catch myself eating my daughter's leftovers as I stood at the sink to do the dishes. Mom: the garbage disposal. I also eat standing up at parties. OK, maybe there's no place to sit down at the party, but you get the idea. It's like if you are standing up it doesn't count. If you fix yourself a plate, maybe even set a placemat and a napkin, light a candle or something...you are much more likely to realize that you are eating. Sounds simple. Try it!

Guideline #5 is Eat Without Distractions. Again, it's all about paying attention. TURN OFF YOUR TV. (That's my guideline #1!) Of course, you may be chatting with your family or friends, you may have some music playing, but let eating be what you are primarily doing. If you are eating while you're driving, you are, hopefully, mostly driving (for example). If you are eating while you are watching TV, you may keep eating until the show is over and not even know what you had. Even if you cannot escape distraction altogether, make a point of checking in with your body every now and then. How do you feel? Has your body had enough?

Guideline #6 is Eat with the Intention of Being in Full View of Others. Do you have eating habits that you would never indulge in when you had company? Do you sneak food that you would never eat if someone were watching? I remember a few times that I ate something simply BECAUSE no one was watching me. (Can't miss those opportunities!) Of course, we all have times we eat alone (and if we are trying to eat without distraction, it is helpful to eat alone sometimes), but we should then respect ourselves as our own witnesses. (What would I think if I saw myself eating this way?)

Guideline #7 is Eat with Enjoyment, Gusto and Pleasure. When you eat a bag of chips while you're watching TV when you are not hungry, do you enjoy them? (Do you even notice them?) Diets can take all the joy out of eating, but eating can be and should be pleasurable. (For me it's too pleasurable.) If you really feel hungry, and you choose something that your body wants and needs, and you sit down and pay attention to the food you've chosen, and then you stop eating when your body has had enough so that you don't ruin the beauty of this meal with a follow up tummy-ache and possible guilt-fest, don't you think you would really enjoy that food? And if you really enjoy and appreciate your food, don't you think you will pay attention to it?

Do you eat behind your own back? If so, do you enjoy that food? And you don't enjoy the food, what is that about?

If you think you don't eat behind your own back (like I did), try following all these guidelines. If one of them is hard for you, that's where you need to put your attention. (If they're all easy, you probably don't need to be reading my blog!)

Remember, it's simple: all you have to do is pay attention.